Dear PM John Howard

Dear Prime Minister John Howard of Australia, Many of my readers may not be aware that all people over the age of 18 are required to vote in elections by law in Australia. The exceptions are (of course) the organisations with an artificially heightened religious status such as Jehovah’s Witnesses.

I was de-listed to vote years ago and when I contacted your Australian Electoral Commission (AEC) to apply for conscientious objector status, I was told I needed to belong to a religious cult in order to be eligible and that I am not permitted to think for myself under Australian law. I resented this implication and I have since not ever enrolled to vote. Nevertheless, the AEC operator told me that to be a conscientious objector and at the same time, exist independently of a religious cult/organisation, that I simply should not enrol to vote – to break the law – go figure? I hadn’t voted before this time, since I had always submitted an empty voting ballot form. I won’t bore you with my somewhat complicated reasons why (relative to your comprehension skills that is).

But this is not the reason I write to you. No, it is the very rare victory that Science has had recently. I am writing to you to make a deal. I will forgive the implication that Australians are not permitted to think for themselves if you follow the lead of the UK government and even more, I will submit one vote for you! I will even forgive you for taking away my firearm licence those many years ago just because some psycho 2500km away went berzerk with a semi-automatic rifle. I know you do not possess critical thinking skills Mr. Howard, and neither do your nemeses, but I will forgive you for that.

You see, the UK government have recently announced that Intelligent Design has no part in a school that teaches Science; how great is that for our society!? This announcement has tipped me over the edge and given me some hope – I will do just about anything to have the same for our vulnerable Australian children. Please Mr. Howard!

So, I implore you, please follow suit, for the sake of my children and their well-being if anything. But of course, I know all you care about at the end of the day is my vote and believe me, you will get it! I will even vote for a government; that’s how desperate I am to save my children from the Monotheistic attacks that are conducted so readily and openly in so many civilisations today, including the one that you currently govern.

So, how about it?